Do you have any disappointments on the table that you have yet to resolve or get past? Perhaps you feel you have done everything that can be done to move on from the “What Could Have Been”? May be it was a career opportunity or relationship that fell through or fell apart? What next? How does one maximize their productivity after there has been so much emotional effort put into something that did not come to fruition? When the dynamics of life stretch us beyond our usual capacity to handle hardships and trials, we must begin to think in terms of reframing the situation.  

It is very important to recognize that we only have so much control over difficult equations that life places before us regardless of how brilliant we think we are. Yes, we do have control over many areas of our lives that are fueled by desire and discipline; but that to requires a constant flow of evaluating and re-evaluating to deal with unwanted mistakes.

To get past disappointment there must be a psychological conclusion to the losing season so we can move forward and reframe life’s unattractive portraits.

First of all, there needs to be a level of understanding in our mindsets that obstacles are a prerequisite for success. No great leader or entrepreneur has ever made an impact in his or her field without resistance of some sort. In whatever form it appears, we should develop a pattern of using life’s resistance to build strong leadership muscles that will benefit us both professionally and personally.

The second step in reframing is to ask, “How did I grow from this unwanted experience or outcome?” Unless we can identify areas of growth, there is a good chance we will remain stuck. Once we identify the value of how we grew, we can use it to pivot and oscillate our strengths in a way that will create sustainable impact for future projects and ideas.

Thirdly, we all should look deep inside and admit any faults that occurred on our part and take responsibility for actions that were detrimental to our vision. This includes negative self –talk as well as the damaging affect of blaming others for every mishap that came our way. It’s amazing what happens when we except error even when it is obvious that someone maligned us some way.  

Lastly, the most valuable attribute that will be acquired from reframing your experience is the ability to help others get unstuck and arrive at their desired destination. Getting your mind off of your own problems helps put the previous three steps into action. Now you will become very valuable to those that you have inspired and they will view you as a beautifully framed portrait to be admired.